A hiker became lost in the woods and he spent several days
wandering without food or water. Finally, he was able to kill
a bald eagle and was cooking the eagle over a campfilre when
he was found by forest rangers.
They had no choice but to arrest him for harming an
endangered spiecies.
The hiker's trial came up and he explained to the judge,
"Your honor, I was lost without food or water, and spent
three days in the forest. I had to kill and eat the eagle."
The judge, dismissed all charges due to the extenuating
circumstances and extreme situation.
As the hiker was leaving the courtroom, the judge asked,
"By the way, what did the Bald Eagle taste like?"
The hiker replied, "Something like a mix between a Spotted
Owl and California Condor -but less greasy than a Whooping
Crane."
Q: How many vegans does it take to change a
lightbulb?
A: Two, one to change it and one to check for animal
ingredients.
Q: How many vegans does it take to change a
lightbulb?
A: None, vegans can't change anything.
A man had a parrot that could talk. Unfortunately, it
swore a lot. In an effort to get the parrot to be quiet, he
put him in a cupboard. The parrot continued swearing and
after a while the man decided to put the bird in the
refrigerator.
After a few minutes, he suddenly became quiet. The man
opened up the refrigerator and the parrot said, "I'm sorry,
sir, it will never happen again." As the man took the bird
out of the refrigerator he wondered what made the difference.
Just then, the parrot said, "So, uh, what'd the chicken
do?"
Q: What do you call a vegetarian who goes back to
eating meat?
A: Someone who lost their veg-inity!
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